


O.B.J.E.C.T.I.O.N.

by EveningRose309



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Detectives, Crack, Crimes & Criminals, Detective Percival Graves, Fluff and Crack, Light Angst, Mentions of Pregnancy, Mob Boss AU, Mob Boss Gellert Grindelwald, Multi, Romantic Comedy, They Broke Into A Chapel, Weddings, and Ava, angst at the end, or at least Vinda did
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:46:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22032784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EveningRose309/pseuds/EveningRose309
Summary: “If anyone has a reason that these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace.” Five different people burst into the chapel from different entrances, each with a different objection.Or five reasons, more or less, why Percival is not marrying Theseus and why chapel security should be a thing.
Relationships: Leta Lestrange/Theseus Scamander, Original Percival Graves/Gellert Grindelwald, Original Percival Graves/Theseus Scamander
Comments: 10
Kudos: 31





	O.B.J.E.C.T.I.O.N.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts), [AlastorGrim](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlastorGrim/gifts), [Willofhounds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willofhounds/gifts).



> HEEYYYYYYY
> 
> A mob boss au! ....thing, sort of, maybe? Anyways, this prompt was just too good, I know I should be doing other things, but the thing just.....rocketed itself into existence.

"OBJECTION!” rang through the room as the crowd collectively wondered how on earth this was even happening.

Percival shook his head in disbelief. “Ignore them, Father Phillips, you can go on now.”

The old man, understandably, seemed not to hear him as the five- two heavily armed in tuxedos -intruders settled themselves into the chapel. One from the pews, one from the side windows, one from the main door, one from the ceiling, and- of course Newt, of course -from the gaping hole in the floorboards that had apparently singed clean through the carpet.

“Actually,” the father said, slowly reeling himself back into reality. “Ehem, actually, I’d like to hear- that is, to know what they’ve got to say?”

All the while Theseus was staring at his brother as if they didn't see him pull this kind of shit nearly every day of the week.

“Newt!?” and there went their last chances of sanity. “Brother, what in hell!?”

“Thes,” the younger Scamander answered breathlessly. “Theseus, you cannot marry him. I will not let you finish these vows.”

“He’s got a point Scamander,” Travers piped from his mad stance at the door.

“And what point is that sir?” Theseus stared.

“Simple,” the other answer. “Who you’ve got standing on that dais is the most wanted man in New York City, and I’m sure a fine man like yourself wouldn’t want to be tied to a traitor now would you?”

Oohs and aahs erupted from the guests, as Newt muttered bashfully, “Well, my reason was going to be that Leta is pregnant, but alright I suppose.”

“LETA IS WHAT!?”

And thus Percival’s mind went from mad to annoyed. Frankly, he should have seen this coming. Count on Travers to find some form of incriminating evidence on the morn of his wedding day. This was precinct 13. Shit like this always happens.

His gaze shifted from the chief and forensics officer to the other three awkwardly standing objecties. He started at the most civilized looking one first.

“And what do you have to object-” Percival exclaimed, “-to my wedding, Officer Abernathy?”

Heads turned and the poor little man that was Colin Abernathy seemed to blanch on the spot.

“W-well sir- uh, Detective Graves,” he stuttered, “-I- uhm-”

“In this century, Abernathy.”

The man swallowed.

“Well sir,” he stated, “it just doesn’t fit.”

Confusion all around as Percival raised a brow.

“I-I mean-” Abernathy added. “What is mean is, well, look at you! You’re too perfect! Exes who’ve made up and gotten together again. Partners for nearly half a decade. The perfect love story make up. You sound like a detective rom-com novel!”

Percival pursed his lips, blinking slowly. _A detective rom-com novel_.

“Your point, Abernathy?”

“What I mean sir is that marriages like this don’t last. You- you’ve broken up before, broken yourselves before, what’s to stop it from happening again? And- and if you fight at home and that follows you to work, sir, it would be chaos! The precinct will be divided in two and I- I can’t let that happen, S-sir.”

The crowd began to murmur. All Percival could do was heave a sigh.

“Your concern for my domestic life is appreciated Abernathy” he answered tiredly, then turning his gaze to a woman clad in tech-gear and a kalashnikov on her arm.

“And you Rosier? What’s your excuse for bombing my wedding? Did your boss tell you to?”

“I come of my own accord Graves,” the French sniper sneered. “And frankly, that I do so says more about you than it does him.”

The crowd fell deathly silent.

Percival squinted. “Really?”

Vinda leveled a glare at him.

“You are a traitor Graves, in more ways than one. You betrayed your precinct. You betrayed the family-”

Family.

“-but more so you are a liability,” she added, “-and I am under obligation to shoot liabilities in the head.”

“Then shoot me later,” Percival said calmly. “Or better yet tomorrow, after I’ve consummated my marriage.”

The Hand bagan to laugh. “You are a fool, Graves. Tomorrow would give you the chance to relay your misbegotten findings to your husbands. Then him to your friends. Then your team. Your chief. The world. You would ruin us, Graves, and frankly, it would be easier to silence you if there were only one mouth talking.”

“So you’re saying-”, his hands were beginning to tighten, “-that if I marry Theseus, you’d have to kill both of us, and if I don’t, you’d kill me all the same but only me?”

Vinda nodded.

“That,” she added, “and Leta is my second niece. And a good lawyer. I will not have you darkening her future by marrying the father of her child.”

The crowd’s mutterings began anew as Theseus muttered the word ‘Child’ over and over again. Percival sighed, closing his, eyes then opening them again. Four down, one left. He looked up to gaze into wide, doll-like eyes staring down at him from the hole in the ceiling.

“And you, Kid?” he called and the other eyes came to land on the shape of the scrawny little girl in the scaffolding. The only one small enough to have been able to climb up there, and ingenious enough to drop a box of bricks through the meek wood. And a hammer, because didn’t Papa teach her beating things made them easier to kill?

The pair of odd eyes blinked, saying nothing, as pale spindly fingers brought up a tape recorder to their view. A click, and the crowd was left to gape in disbelief as crackled voices began to play.

_“So you’re going to marry him?”_

No. _“No.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“He loves someone else.”_

_No you idiot_ , Percival gritted his teeth but said nothing.

_“Hmph, he thinks **you** love someone else.”_

A laugh sweeter than honey and thin as arsenic filled his ears.

_“Yes, I suppose that is quite… stupid of him.”_

Asshole.

_“You’re stupid too-”_

Exactly!

_“-and that’s why you fit-”_

No!

_“-you can be stupid together!”_

Mercy Lewis.

_“I- eheh, I think I’d like that my dear. But- he won’t say yes to me.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“Why not? Well, for starters, I don’t have a ring! What kind of a man proposes without a ring?”_

_“Give him Mama’s ring!”_

_“Your Mama’s ring?”_

_“Yeah!”_

A chuckle.

_“I- don’t think he’d like that, Pretty.”_

_“Mama liked it!”_

_“Your mother”_ , God, _“was in love with your father. She loved him. That’s why she liked it.”_

Oh God. Oh God no-

 _“Percival Graves-”_ , please, _“-does not love me.”_

The tape ended. Sobs rang through the room, a few more murmurs, and he could see Queenie was holding back tears. He couldn’t blame her, his eyes were starting to burn themselves.

But of course, it wasn’t over. It never was with _the Family_. Percival could only steady his breath as the little girl began to lower something on a piece of string.

“I like you,” she said as the crowd watched on. “And he likes you too. He’s broken. So are you-”

No one moved, all seemingly frozen in place.

“-we can be family,” she smiled. “The three of us, you, me, and him. And Vinda. And Kraft. And everyone too. Cree too-”

The boy in question snapped his head up, mouth gaping but Percival paid him no mind.

“Please?” and the hearts in the room seemed to collectively break and sob. “Please Percy?”

All eyes, teary, angry, confused, turned to him. But Percival couldn’t answer. He said nothing, no words out of his mouth, his mind frozen. Sounds were deaf to him as the world seemed to fall-

-and his eyes stayed on the beaten metal band dangling on a piece of rainbow string.


End file.
